Scrumptious And Sinfully Satisfying

The Down Low and My Many Thoughts

2009-05-27T03:18:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been such a while since I have posted on this blog. So much has happened and is going on and of course.... I have a few thoughts to share.

First off, dang! This has been the hardest pregnancy out of the last three. I don't know what it is (well, actually, I think it's a boy!) but this pregnancy has just about kicked my butt. Thanks heaves I have the perspective that even though it's hard, it's only for a short time and it's well worth it, or we would be stopping with this baby and not trying for 5 like we would like.

I'm at that point of life again, where everything seems to be swirling around me and I'm just trying to keep up. I'm beginning to think that perhaps that never really ends? Especially when you are a mom? My kids are getting older, they have so much going on in their life's, I'm working as hard as I can to be there for them. And then trying to keep up with Janzen and his schedule and fit in the rest of my responsibilities and find time to fulfill some of my own personal needs. It takes work people!! It's fun, crazy, hectic and there isn't anything I wouldn't rather be doing. But it's amazing sometimes how much it can take out of you.

I am so super excited to watch Allana grow, she is going to be graduating Kindergarten in just a few short weeks! I feel like over this last year I have watched her grow from a toddler into a kid! A smart kid, who catches everything you say and holds you to what you say and needs explanations about the darnedest things!!

Sarina is not my little baby any more... she asks "why" about everything.. seems to notice everything and is turning more and more into a little independent, daredevil girl!

Honestly though... my children crack me up 24/7, they bring new light and prospective into my life and just make it a whole lot darn more fun. For that.. I will be forever grateful to them!

I feel like if I blink, I will have children that are off and married and Janzen and I will be in our 60'S. Sound a little paranoid?? Probably is.. but at the moment it's how I feel. =)

Besides all of our summer adventures we have planned, I am super excited to start taking flight lessons again! It honestly scares the crap out of me (there is so much to do and quite a bit of pressure) but it will feel nice having something that I am working on that is for me and in the long run will provide a nice chunk of extra money ( and that's always a good thing! =)).

My biggest thing right now is trying not to get caught up in everything and I do mean EVERYTHING.. staying cool.. and trying as hard as I can to life life one moment at a time. I think that is one of the saddest things that can happen to people..... we wait so long to get to this Earth and then *POOF* everyday things crowd up our lives.. we focus on the wrong things and then another *POOF* and were looking back and thinking about everything we should have done.

What I use to center myself really is the Gospel, if I center my life and family around that... my life is a hundred times easier. Then I have to add in a few hobbies and interests that keep my brain stimulated besides the run of the mill every day things. Not a bad idea, right? I think if you can try and be as well rounded as possible, it's not only healthy for you... but sets an amazing example for your children.

So in short.... my latest and greatest quest as been to stop and smell the roses.... huge my kids just a little bit longer, take the time to sincerely tell Janzen I love him and try as hard as I can to listen to what the Lord is trying to tell me among all the other noise the word is throwing at me.

I think that's how we find peace, confidence and our true inner self's. It's all there waiting for us, everything were looking and longing for... we just have to take the time to find it. =)

The Creator Within Us

2009-03-04T14:27:00.000-08:00

Time flys. For real and you know what? I dont think I like it!

2009-02-25T16:39:00.000-08:00

Do you remember being a kid and it seemed like all of the adults around you were telling you not to hurry, to slow down, have patience? Tomorrow, or Christmas or your Birthday would be here soon enough, right?

I don't know about you, but I heard that ALL the freaking time!! It seemed like days stretched on and on...... and months and years seemed like an eternity. Well, it's not the case anymore. In fact, the same stress I felt as a kid because time seemed to be going too slow, I feel now as an adult because time is going too fast!

I have been married for over eight years and seriously, it feels like maybe only two or three years ago did Janzen and I tie the knot. Allana is five years old! Are you kidding? She should still be a baby, it really hasn't been over five years has it? And Sarina... it feels like just yesterday I was pregnant with her!!!

And to be honest.... I really can't believe how old I am, it really does feel just like yesterday I was sixteen dreaming and wondering what the next few years would hold. Rock star career, fancy new car, trip to Milan, Paris, and Egypt...maybe work part time for NASA and the FBI...anyway.. back to the subject.

So I wonder, where does all this time go? Am I the only one who has experienced the phenomenon?

I think what really gets me is all the things I meant to do.. that I didn't do... and realize I meant to do them YEARS ago. Really, years just tick on by now, one day it's spring and the next, bam! It's Christmas (that would have been rock awesome when I was a kid, but not now!)! I seriously don't want to be eighty with a super long bucket list to complete.. because heaven knows I'd attempt to complete it and end up in the grave faster!!

The other thing that gets me is, kids REALLY do grow fast! I remember thinking at the beginning of a pregnancy that nine months seemed so long to have to wait to hold my little one and then five years later I'm wishing she was still a baby. Not because I don't love her the way she is, but because everything happened so fast, I'm wondering if I missed something?? A laugh, a smile.. did I really enjoy those first years as much as I should have?

Perhaps that is the fear associated with the feeling that time is moving too fast. You are afraid your missing something, not taking it all in.
I like my life the way it is right now and I like my children they way they are right now.... But I know.... someday, someday too soon... my life and my children will change. I look forward to it.. with hesitance.. maybe because I am selfish in this area? I like my life and family the way it is and am afraid to have teenagers?!?!?! Ha!

Well.. this is just something I have been noticing lately and thinking about. Do you all ever feel this way too? You ever feel like you woke up one morning and WAM-BAM, next thing you knew you were ten years older, have a man sleeping beside you and kids spilling cold cereal all over the kitchen??

My Love Language

2008-11-14T13:53:00.000-08:00

I feel loved when...

The Five Love Languages

My Primary Love Language is Physical Touch

My Detailed Results:
Physical Touch:	8
Quality Time:	7
Receiving Gifts:	7
Words of Affirmation:	4
Acts of Service:	4

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Tag 3 people so they can find out what their love language is.

Check out the Book

Family Blog

2008-11-13T11:22:00.001-08:00

Some of you are saying you can't find the Family blog.
You can link to it through my profile information or this link:
http://vandykeslife.blogspot.com/

Check both blogs for updates, craziness, thoughts, photos of the kiddos, wonder woman greetings, photos of Charlie (our new dog!) and all that jazz. This blog is going to become my personal blog, so for family info hit the other one!
Ciao!

2008-11-05T19:24:00.000-08:00

Things are moving too fast. I can't keep up.
Everyday is like another leaf falling from an autumn tree.
One here, two there, all of the sudden three.
The winds keeps blowing, moving things along.
I'm not ready though, I can't seem to keep up and I don't know whats wrong.
Is it so much to ask for a moment, to stop, sit, think and rest?
Why must I feel the weakest when it's time for my will to be put to the test?

Falling, twirling, dancing in the wind. All the other leafs know the their rhythm and place.
But, I can't quite seem to catch up, to keep my pace.
When will I return to the dance? For, this season I can not wast.
One here, two there, all of the sudden three....
Everything is moving on around me......

***For all the moms that can't always keep up with the 24/7 craziness of life!
It's okay, grab a hot chocolate, sit by the fire and drink life in my friends. ***

I wish I may, I wish I might..

2008-10-13T13:30:00.000-07:00

I wish I could read my husbands mind (seriously, that would be amazing!).

I wish I could show people how I really feel and not worry about what they might think.

I wish I liked protein shakes as much as I like chocolate.

I wish someone who loves me could hear all my silent fears and tell me it's going to be okay.

I wish I was stronger, in every way possible!

I really do wish I had superpowers.

I wish the world was a safer, happier, more beautiful place (Eden to be exact) for my children to grow up in.

I wish I had more answers to everything then I do now.

I wish I could fly.

I wish Santa Clause was real and I could be an elf for one Christmas.

I wish I believed in miracles just a little bit more.

I wish I could rap, and paint and change the world.

I wish I could say everything I try to say and ALWAYS have it come out right.

I wish I didn't giggle at naughty jokes.

I wish I could "just know" when my friends need love and hugs and just "appear".

I wish women could talk to the babies in their bellies.

I wish I could ALWAYS remember who I really am and who I am trying to be and who I am trying to be with in the end.

Just a scant few of my "wishes" what are some of yours?

Momma, Wimps, Cat's In The Dryer And So Forth...

2008-10-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you all have heard it before "You can't be a wimp and be a mother". Well... actually.. you can. You would probably just make a very, very bad mother.

Motherhood.. you see it's really not for the anxiety prone, neat freak, organized, need to stick to a schedule type of woman. Unfortunately, I am all of those things and more. So maybe motherhood is for the neurotic... maybe it's not just about having a clean house, clean kids, gourmet meals, husband who wares shoes not sandals to church (whoops, did I just say that?) size 1 pant size, mountain climbing, fire throwing, craft wizard, animated story teller type of woman who breaths peace, joy and never, ever....ever.... has an unkind word or thought. Maybe there is a lot more to it.

I think we should all "strive" for these things (although some of you may want to opt out on the fire throwing), but strive is the key word. Not hold our selves to all of these standers at once.

I think when they say "You can't be a wimp and be a mother" they are talking about baby puke, poopy diapers, days when you toddler traps the cat in the dryer and they only way you find out about it is when you turn the dryer on. Days when everyone throws a tantrum and you get a bloody nose (by accident of course, but toddler fists are STRONG!), days when children dirty everything you clean right after you just cleaned it and you have guests coming over, days when dinner is ruined because some little one was playing with the controls on the oven and no one wants black, hard pork chops.

I could go on and on and on... however, what is simply amazing is that even though motherhood is not for wimps it is for those that want to have their lives changed in the most amazing way possible. I heard another quote that said "Motherhood is letting your heart walk around outside of your body".

For me it's watching my heart and life get on the school bus and not look back because she is so grown up she doesn't need my reassurance 24/7 any longer. It's watching my heart sleeping in my arms and being pretty sure that she as grown a couple of feet and one day... very soon... is going to be taller then me, one day too soon.

It's watching my heart grow up each passing moment and wondering if they will ever know how much I love them and wondering if they will stop and pause on this race through childhood and see how much they have changed me and made me a better person and how forever indebted to them I am.

Motherhood isn't for wimps.. but the strange thing is.. it has the power, if we let it, to take the wimpy things about us and make them strong. The power that is held in one little hand, one little smile, one little giggle is truly a life changing gift.

Hats off to all you mothers! Were not wimps for sure and we totally rock!

Rain, Sun and Run Fat Boy Run

2008-10-08T12:49:00.000-07:00

I know recently I wrote a previous post involving storms and rain. Well.... I'm thinking about it again. It's something I like to think about, because I never cease to amaze myself at how easy it is for me to forget that even though it rains... and poors.. and rains some more, the sun never fails to dry up all the rain. Just like in The Itsy Bisty Spider song. =)

So... I'm saying it to myself and to all of you again. Rain falls, but the sun always drys it up!!

And............

Last night Da Man and I watched- Run Fat Boy Run.

And then right afterwards I went and signed up for a 5K in Edmonds.

Yes, I already know that most of you are thinking... Wow... compulsive! Yes, you're right! It is compulsive and I am compulsive, because.. well.. that's just how I get things done. And really, I have been wanting to do this for a while, so comment on it! That way I will feel even more compelled to do it!!

Oh Mighty Colors!

2008-10-07T10:48:00.000-07:00

~you are deep pink~

Your dominant hues are red and magenta. You love doing your own thing and going on your own adventures, but there are close friends you know you just can't leave behind.

You can influence others on days when you're patient, but most times you just want to go out, have fun, and do your own thing.

Your saturation level is high - you get into life and have a strong personality. Everyone you meet will either love you or hate you - either way, your goal is to get them to change the world with you. You are very hard working and don't have much patience for people without your initiative. Your outlook on life is very bright.

You are sunny and optimistic about life and others find it very encouraging, but remember to tone it down if you sense irritation.
the spacefem.com html color quiz

The Short and Simple of ME.

2008-10-06T21:35:00.000-07:00

I am a super hero (at least my kids think so and that's all that matters)

I fly planes. Yup, it's very awesome, I know.

I am happy, loud, wild, serious, giggly and cool.

I love life, my family and who I have turned into.

I think sharks and spiders have it IN for me.

Sometimes I talk to myself.

I really, really, really LOVE mangos, they are the food of the Gods and Indian food is right there also.

I'm a dork and I don't care.

When I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut, secret FBI agent who doubled as a rock star. Seriously.

I love to be loved.

I am afraid people will see how silly I am so I try to be serious. Although, sometimes, I really am serious.

I love the colors, purple, red, burnt orange and green. Sometimes teal.

People mean a lot to me, I can't help it, I just care.

Life thrills me and scares me at the same time.

It pisses me off that I can't spell worth a darn. Really, it does.

Tagged.....

2008-08-28T16:51:00.000-07:00

I got Tagged!
by SAM!

The rules: List 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 goals, 3 current obsessions/collections, 3 facts about yourself. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog!

3 Joys: My family, flying and my friends

3 Fears: Spiders, sharks and crraaazzyyy people (they all have it in for me I sware!)

3 Obsessions/Collections: Dancing, improving myself and family and computer stuff (ie, blogging, facebook..ect)

3 Goals: Get my pilots license in the next year and half, have another baby in the next year, become a better wife and mother overnight! ha!

3 Facts about me: I LOVE to try new things, life is an adventure to me. I LOVE mangos! Were trying for baby number three!

I'm going to Tag: Eileen, Rach, Kate, Charlotte and Sara

Life Thinkings.......

2008-08-26T17:35:00.000-07:00

Flying.. I love flying. Every since I was a little kid I always dreamed of flying.. that feeling of leaving everything you know behind and venturing into the wild blue yonder (or into outer space as I actually wanted to be an astronaut).

Recently I attended a close friends wedding and I flew from SEA to SFO. I got to thinking as I sat there in my little seat, squished between a loud German and a grumpy gay guy. At first I was thinking how freaking annoying it is to fly "common" class, as I like to call it, rather then first class. Then as I heard the captain announce that we were going to be landing shorty in San Fran and to enjoy the sun while we saw it because it was cold, nasty and dark below... I started looking out the window. The conclusions that came there on out are probably conclusions many of you have already thought. I've thought them before, but this time, for some reason.. they sank in a little more.

Seriously, who can look out the window of a plane.. high above the clouds... and not be in wonder. The sun making everything except for the great blue of the sky a brilliant white. This to me is what I think some small part of heaven must look like. Pure, beautiful, bright and a little fluffy.

Then we started descending into the fluffy, misty clouds.... still brilliantly white... until they gradually start to thicken, deepen, not only in texture but in color. White turns to a light grey, grey turns to a greenish-blue and so on until finally it's a murky, thick mess of greyness were flying through. Then we break through the clouds and see below, the trees, city, ocean.. all very pretty in their own way.. but dark.. hardly any of the light from above is getting through the thick, dark veil of clouds.

Veil. And then I wondered, how similar this veil of clouds that block out the pure white brilliance of above is to the veil that was placed over our minds when we entered this body and Earth. A veil strong enough to make us forget such unmanageable beauty, to forget the ones we loved and to allow us to be far enough from the light so that temptation could gain a possible root in our souls.

It's very interesting to compare two. I went on to think how even though the veil of clouds was thick enough to almost completely block out the rays of the sun.. not all of the suns light is blocked. The clouds and storms, dark and menacing as they are only live for a flicker of an instant compared to the suns life span.

Most of all when you compare the two.. it's interesting to think that if we were silly little humans that didn't know that even when the clouds are thick and dark there is still this bright beautiful light flooding the entire sky above, waiting, just on the other side of the clouds. Silly, yes.. but in life I still sometimes forget how fleeting the dark clouds are and that even though I'm here, in this place where Satan seems to work harder and harder to convince us that dark clouds is all there is, there is still something more waiting.

So from that flight I was able to see a comparison that affected me in a spiritual sense.

The veil is thick, it makes it easier for us to focus on the (in comparison to where we came from) dark world around us. But the veil has holes, and if we look hard enough we can find them and catch a snippet of the brilliance that is waiting for us.For me.. when I look at it that way.. it kinda puts everything back into perspective.

Eh...... eh eh eh....

2008-08-19T14:21:00.000-07:00

I can't help it.. I don't know whats going on inside of my average sized cranium.. I feel EH. Not the kind of "eh" with exclamation marks lined up behind it, followed by an over-exaggerated growl. Just a mild, flip of the hand, roll of the eyes, slight sigh, shrugging shoulders kind of eh...
It's like I have a exclamation mark above me head, but I'm not really exclaiming anything.. I'm just eh-ing everything. Sound familiar? Anyone felt the elusive, yet over pronounced "eh" before?
Well, I think I have decided I don't like feeling "eh". I don't like feeling any feeling that is rather elusive, hard to name and describe and plain annoying. I don't want to feel them anymore and that's all there is to it. And even as I write the previous sentence I feel the "eh" feeling mocking my with a slightly smug face.... as if saying "eh, I'm here to stay a bit longer, so suck it up chicka".
I think this is probably the most bland post I have written, however, I felt it might be funny to share my "eh" story with you all. I'm not looking for the all mighty "eh" antidote.. just well.. someone to read about my "eh" moment. Did I mention I hate feeling EH?
Okay, I'm done now with my over- dramatic craziness.
P.S. Please feel free to share your "eh" stories, perhaps we could start an "eh" support group! lol
P.P.S NO, I am not depressed and yes my life is awesome.. it's just an "eh" moment.. =)

Berry Drama

2008-07-07T13:04:00.000-07:00

It all started like this....

One fine berry picking Saturday Aryn, Allana, Sarina and I are digging out and disposing of the over ripened berries from our hard earned berry mother-load. A few mins pass, a few more mins pass and all of the sudden I hear "What the hell?!?! I don't think it's very funny you know, stop throwing them at me you (((beep)))!"

I look up and I see a very enraged, middle aged, blond lady staring at me as if she were imagining my head hanging on her wall. I ask her whats the matter and it turns out Aryn was disposing of her over ripened berries by throwing them behind her, where this woman's face happened to be. This lady was the unfortunate receiver of a berry to the face, chest and stomach (not cool, I agree). I tried to explain that we weren't purposely trying to hit her with said berry weapons, just clean out our mother-load. She had none of it. She was convinced that we were plotting her demise and throwing berries directly at her simply to amuse ourselves.

Not wanting to have to re-explain that is was an "accident" that apologize again for the whole silly incident, I simple bent my head down and went back to work hoping she would just walk away.

That's when I heard " Here, YOU have an accident then!!!" I then looked up to see a flat of berries flying through the air at my head and even worse (for her sake) my kids head.

Something seriously surprising happened to me.. I felt myself rise up and proceeded to feel and listen to myself as I hit my chest and yelled "You want to start something? Huh? Is that what all this drama is about, you looking for a fight? Don't you throw anything at my kids again, or I'm gunna be starting something lady!" This all took place cave woman style, not pretty.

Yep, I know what you all are thinking... holy 1-800-Jerry-Springer. I'm just as surprised as you all, I take pride in dealing with irrational people in a rational way. There was just something about a stranger throwing a flat of berries at my kids head! Dude, you so don't mess with my kids, I will take you DOWN!

This is a new feeling for me, I have never had anyone (in my mind) threaten my kids before, so I have never needed to go all Springer on anyone.

I think I could have said a few other things that may have been more appropriate, but, wow, even fools know, don't mess with a mother bear.

So yes, I have enrolled Aryn in berry aggression therapy, I have enrolled in mother bear therapy and no berries have been thrown and no inner Jerry Springer has risen in the last 2 days.

It does make me wonder though, how 2 or 3 strawberries and invoke so much anger towards a perfect stranger. This isn't my first encounter of angry strangers and I can't help but wonder whats making everyone so hateful?

When so much anger abides in a berry field.. over a few berries..?

Any ideas?

My babies.. that aren't really babies any longer.

2008-06-09T10:04:00.000-07:00

This my lovely family. My sweet little ladies (4 1/2 years and 21 months) and my Janzen during his hawk faze.

When do children grow? It is at night while no one is watching, or during the day right before our eyes? All I know for sure is that it happens to fast. It's like sand slipping through my fingers.

Not to say that I'm not excited to watch and be apart of such an amazing thing. It's just quite

simple, I miss my babies and I want to hold on to these precious years.. just a little bit longer.

He makes his debut!

2008-06-04T22:03:00.000-07:00

Toby Gacamo Vader-Von Schnauzer Van Dyke is making his Internet debut.

He is a hyper, healthy, lovable, annoying, desperately cute, into trouble 24/7, five month old puppy.

Why did we get a dog? Well... that's a good question.

I need a furry companion, man! And to tell the truth the cats just weren't cutting the deal. See, Kitty and Tilly really don't dig long hikes and moonlit beach walks. Toby rides shot gun with me in my Durango and seriously, I feel my coolness meter go from 95 to 100 (not a huge jump giving how cool I already am, but still every little bit helps, right?).

Besides, I can't even begin to describe the emotion the flows over me when I watch Toby digging in the sand at the beach with the kids, or chasing them around the park, or playing tag in the house. I know, I know, I sound like one of those crazy, over the top, sick and psycho willing to let their dog lick them on the lips and have no problem picking up their poo with their bare hands people.. but I'm not. Dude, I just love my dog, okay?

So that being said.. Enjoy the pics of Toby Boby.

Stay tuned for more in depth and fascinating tell-alls.... yeah... you don't even know... =)

Dogs, Kids, Tanning, Feet, In-laws and Super-Duper-Aweosme Smores

2008-06-03T19:35:00.001-07:00

Hello my faithful audience!

Well, since I haven't posted any blogs before this and don't actually have an "audience" in proper terms, lets just use our imaginations on that one.

So this is the deal, I have wanted to write on here FOR-FREAKING-EVER!

Sometimes, as I lay my simple head down to sleep, I actually lie awake and think about how I would author different things in my life into a witting, hopefully fun to read blog.

Here goes! But first there are three things you should know:

1-I can't spell!

2- I can be and sometimes am.. a retard, silly, amazing, loud, happy, crazy, serious and funny!

3- I am the weirdest most awesome person masquerading around like a normal person you will EVER meet.

Yep, that should do it.

Now so that this post at least slightly corresponds with the tittle...... and gives a slight outline for further posts.....

-I have a dog! Wow, yes. Wow. His name is Toby and there will be more posts about him I'm sure!

-My kids are 21 months and 4 and a half years. Much of my most fascinating material is going to be inspired by them.

-I tan. I used to be deathly white and I'm something like a roasted marshmallow.....humm.. so true!

-Do you think someone could walk around for 3 weeks on a fractured foot?? I did!

-In-laws are coming!

-Smores. I FREAKING love them!

My next posts will be "real" posts. This was just to get me started.. and now I am invincible!!!

Adu